A mishmash of things

So I'm off for the next two days. I spent today at work being depressed because of that. Isn't that the most messed up thing ever? I've gotten to the point that my depression is so bad on my days off that I don't even want them. I did get in to therapy this afternoon, though. I think talking about it helped, and we've added Welbutrin to my repertoire of head meds. The Prozac obviously had no middle ground between feeling emotionless and crying all the time. So we left the Prozac where it is and added the new drug. Hopefully it will help balance me out without making me a zombie. I hadn't realized how bad that actually was until now.

I have some plans for tomorrow, though. Hopefully that will make the day easier. I'm meeting my sponsor at a noon AA meeting. Then later carolinecrane is taking me out for dinner before we go to another writers group meet up. We'll see if that goes better than the last one.

So I haven't really been talking much about work here, but there is some stuff to catch up on. Our owner is building a new property (well, I think it's almost finished, actually), and he's been talking about bringing people over there to help open the new property. He's told me he wants me to "set the standard", and I have been trying to do that. I know he often (at least he used to) promotes from within, and I'm really hoping that I will be considered for a managers position. The problem is that I'm afraid I might be getting my hopes up for a position that's not even on the table. Dr. M says I should just outright ask him, that I should make it known that I want that. This is a prospect that terrifies me. Any thoughts, guys?

Randomly, I was talking to my sponsor today, and God came up again. What she said was something that had been talked about in the convention too. The AA thing is "God either is or he isn't". If forced to make that choice right now, I would say he isn't. So where does that leave me in AA? *sigh*