I am not human.

10! 10! 10! Yaaaaaaybigfuckingdeal... (*cough* I started writing this yesterday, so deal with it.)

So I am even MORE frustrated with my job than I have been lately. The owners bought a new hotel and took one of our desk clerks over there, which I don't care about, but they also took our head of housekeeping. We have another housekeeper that's been here since this place opened, knows the property backwards and forwards, and does the head housekeeper's job on her days off. And management hired someone new to take over the head housekeeper position. I am pissed, partly on behalf of the girl (woman, really) that stayed, but also because if she doesn't get promoted after 15+ years, how the hell am I supposed to believe that I will ever get promoted? C, the new front desk manager, keeps talking about how I'll get promoted if I stick around, and the new GM has been asking me quite often how I think things are going, or how the staff meetings went, and that was giving me hope... but I feel like I'm being strung along at this point. What am I supposed to believe? What I'm told or what I SEE? Seeing is believing, right? Heh.

Also, stuff with writing for the other blog fell through. Got an email from the girl I know that people she was sending their way weren't getting emails back and she wanted to see if I had. I hadn't so I told her that and emailed the other editor again. Saturday I asked the girl I know if I should try again, and got this response: "I checked back with C and the impression I got was that she wasn't interested in bringing you on board." C never even talked to me. I don't know if she even read my stuff at TTC. And that SUCKS. I know that rejection is part of this writing thing, but I had an in this time, and they didn't so much as chat with me. I'm annoyed. And yes, a little insecure now. *sigh*

Maybe I'm too conversational in my reviews and it comes off as unprofessional. I can't decide if I should look at changing my style, or if I should just say "fuck it, this is how I like to write, and someone will just have to appreciate that instead of changing myself."

( Insults, Lennon, Krispy Kremes, and dieting stuffs )

Also, I've been watching Running Wilde and LOVING it. And I got to interview Will Arnett last week!

Now comes the hard part. *g*

I can hardly believe how big cm_exchange has grown! Our first year of the exchange, in 2008, we had 26 people sign up. This year? 52! We have exactly doubled in size!

So tonight begins match ups, which will be twice as hard as year one, but once it's done, it'll be smooth sailing... until November. lol

So, I’m going crazy. Tuesday I went back for a second interview at the place I last posted about. This time I talked to the executive director. He said that the girl I first interviewed was very impressed with me. He was providing a second set of eyes for her, but that she would be doing the actually hiring. He also said that it was narrowed down to me and two other girls. Then he asked questions like “tell me about your personality”. Wtf. How am I supposed to answer that? Anyway, I put on m best face and tried to answer. I think it went okay, but I’m nervous. resolucidity recommend sending a follow up email thanking the girl who would actually hired me, so I did, all this “it was nice talking to you and so-and-so, and I was impressed with the place, and I hope to hear back soon, yada yada”.

I interviewed Tuesday, emailed yesterday, and already feel like calling today and going “OMG PICK MEEEEEEEEEE! I PROMISE I’LL BE GOOOOOD!!!!” Probably not a good idea, huh? *sigh* When should I call back if I don’t hear anything? Next week? Monday? I don’t know!

That’s enough of that. In comms-I-mod-news, cm_exchange sign ups are still going on! Also cmrossiprentiss and ssa_rossi are running past challenges challenges. Check out the user info on each comm for that. And last but not least, microgirl8225 is running the Rossi/Prentiss Wedding Fest over at cmrossiprentiss. Go play! At all of them! lol Or maybe just one. Or two. :P

So some of you remember I’d been talking about a possible manager position coming open, and you and Dr. M all encouraged me to tell the bosses I was interested. So I did. Opening date of the new hotel has been pushed back and back, so I wasn’t sure when to expect to hear. Yesterday I did. C told me what she knew, I guess to give me a heads up/warning. They hired a new guy a couple months ago, and they are making him the manager here, and moving C to the new hotel. I’ve been here FOUR YEARS, and they give it to the guy they just hired?! He has a little experience, but he’s been working at a fucking Krystal for a while before coming here, NOT as a manager. And how am I supposed to GET experience if no one gives me a chance?

Seriously, one of the things I liked about this place when I started was that they promoted from within. WTF. FOUR YEARS. I don’t want to be a damn desk clerk next year, or the year after that, or the year after that. And clearly if they were going to promote me, they would have. I’m pissed and depressed, and I can’t fucking STAND the guy they’re promoting. Guests like him a lot, but he’s a HUGE PHONEY. Ugh.

I finally saw the foot doctor yesterday. He says I have turf toe, and gave me steroids to help with it. I’m a little nervous about it, since it can cause mood changes. I didn't exactly want to tell the damn foot doctor that I'm bipolar. I wonder if the Prozac and Lamictal will hold up to the steroid. We’ll see. He told me if I couldn’t take the side effects, I could stop taking them. He also gave me this pad to wear in my shoe, but I’m not sure if that’s helping or hurting, really. It IS annoying, though.

So I posted fic the other day, and I’m not happy with it. I was unsure to begin with, then I posted. And then I regretted it later. I feel like there should have been more build up than there was. Maybe I can expand it into a larger fic. I want to write longer fic anyway. I need to get inspired, though. Maybe I’ll write loooooong fic for cm_exchange this year.

Speaking of which, I CANNOT BELIEVE it’s time for me and innerslytherin to think about cm_exchange again! We need to kick it off this month. Like SOON. And the lovely, sane resolucidity is helping us out this year. :D You all better play again this year (or start playing), or we’ll hunt you down!

I already pimped this at the main CM comm, but I thought I should pimp here too, in case any of you missed it. This is the role playing game me and innerslytherin run. :)


Rules I Characters I Apply

bau_rpg is looking for new players! We are a post-season four game and we've been going strong now for eight moths. We are looking for players who have the time to contribute and are strong writers. At this time, the main BAU team is taken, but there are still minor characters left to claim. Ever wanted to try your hand at writing Elle Greenaway, Jason Gideon, Haley Hotchner or Ambassador Prentiss? We're the game for you! Other minor characters will also be considered, as well as OCs. Just use the links under the picture to learn about the game, see which characters are available, and apply!

Just want to watch the game? You can do that too. Current game pairings include Rossi/Prentiss and JJ/Will, with Hotch/Reid coming soon! And we even have a readers community for people and players to discuss or comment about the game at bau_rpg_readers!

We hope we'll see you there!

We're extending signups for cm_exchange, since it was a holiday weekend here in America. Signups will now close at midnight EST on Wednesday September 9th!

So if you've been planning to sign up, now is the time to do it! You're not too late! :D We have a bunch of people already signed up this year, doing art and fic both. It's going to be a lot of fun! Come on over and join us!

Eeeeeee! The reveals for cm_exchange went up while I was in bed last night! I didn't post it, but I still feel a little like Santa! LOL

( more exchange recs and fest babbling )

One last thing I want to say before I pimp my own fics, is that overall, I am very, VERY impressed with the fics that came out of this fest. To everyone who participated, if you're reading this, THANK YOU. It was wonderful.

AND NOW FOR THE FICS I WROTE/CO-WROTE!

Title: Worthy of the Word
Author: severity_softly
Pairing: Hotch/Reid
Rating: NC-17/FRAO
Word Count: ~9,000
Warnings/spoilers: Mild spoilers for Damaged (mostly just for the tail end) and major spoilers for Elephant's Memory.
Summary: Hotch and Reid get a push towards each other from an unexpected source, but often, it's easier to admit to what you want than it is to actually take it.
A/N: Written for slash_girl for cm_exchange! A few lines of dialogue have been lifted directly from Elephant's Memory. Thanks to nebula99 for the beta and reassurance that my giftee would not read it and go O.o, and to innerslytherin for the beta and her sheer fabulousness (and all the hand holding when this fic made me bite my nails)!

(Worthy of the Word)

AND! The pinch hit!

Title: Uncertain Terrain
Authors: innerslytherin and severity_softly
Pairing: Hotch/Morgan
Rating: NC-17/FRAO
Word Count: 12,400
Warnings/spoilers: mild violence
Summary/prompt: Lost in the wilderness, Morgan has to take care of an injured Hotch. Afterwards, they have to deal with the way things between them have changed.
A/N: Written for aoibhe for cm_exchange!

(Uncertain Terrain)